Was I molested? Does it count if he had alcohol that night? Is it my fault?

I'll just start out by saying that I was thirteen at the time and I am now fifteen. My dad and I were and still are very close. But this has been on my mind since. It will never go away. I feel like I could have had it worse, so I don't complain. But I need someone/something to vent to. I wanted to talk to my favorite teacher ( I look up to her SO much), but she has to report stuff that she hears like this...One night, my dad and I had our friends over. So there were only four of us. We were down stairs in my dads "Hang out room" and it just seemed normal, like any other night I was hanging out with my dad. We were all having fun, watching some shows and talking and my dad and his friend were drinking out of a keg (my dad never really drinks, he was just having fun that night). It was about midnight and our friends had fallen asleep. I was laying by my dad (which was normal) and I started talking about my dreams and the places I wanted to visit and things like that. He started rubbing my arm (I thought that was normal) and he was talking about how we can go on a family vacation to California and Hawaii and stuff...Then the weird stuff started to happen. He started rubbing my stomach he went up towards my bra then back down...I was scared to death. He rolled up my shirt and was rubbing my stomach. I wanted to tell him to stop but I couldn't because I was so frightened and "frozen" at the time. He eventually got up my bra and he was rubbing and squeezing my breasts and he went down towards my shorts, but he never actually tried to get in my pants. I started kicking my friend on her arm to try to wake her up thinking my dad would stop if she woke up, but she was a very heavy sleeper and she didn't wake up. So its kind of like my dad was bribing me with stuff and touching me at the same time thinking I probably wouldn't notice. He told me that I shouldn't tell anyone because he would get in trouble and we would lose everything and I wouldn't get to go to CA and Hawaii. I still went up to tell my mom what had happened and she was kind of in shock because I had just woken her up with a story like that. I was bawling, I was so terrified. I had forgiven my dad after and we never told polive or anyone. I was worried about my dad's repuatation and mine. It was about two months later that "it" had happened again. I was laying in my mom and dad's bed with my dad and my mom had just hopped in the shower. He started saying stuff to me again and then he started touching me..I honestly don't know what gave him the urge to do it. This time he wasn't drinking alcohol. I was a wreck. I told my mother again, I know she wanted to do something about it, but I couldn't handle all the attention that would have come my way, so I told her to never say anything about it. During the summer my bedroom get's really hot and that same summer I slept with no bra and no shirt on. My dad usually stays up until 1 am and he would walk up the stairs, and put the dog in my room at night..I don't know for a fact if he had touched me that night, but I woke up worried and I felt like something did happen that night. I forgave him. What would you call it if my dad pulled out his "you know what" and started masturbating to show me what it would look like for a man to ***? I never talk to him about it and I never will. I feel uncomfortable...It almost seems like he forgot or could care less. I wish I could forget. I wish I wouldn't have to think about this every day of my life. My parents are split up and have been now for a while..My mother says that that whole or-deal wasn't the reason she made him leave, but I know it was...I just want to know how I am supposed to get this out of my head. Is this molestation? I didn't nessisarily say no, but I was in shock, so was it my fault? Thank you and God Bless to those who took the time to read this and help.